Saturday, February 12, 2011

Valentine's Weekend

I'm having a crap day - emotionally. Physically, it's sunny and gorgeous here. My distaste for Valentine's is attempting to derail me and doing a damned fine job.

This picture by Stacy Reed (lovingly borrowed from She Dreams in Digital) sums up my sentiments for today:

I paid all my bills this morning. I filed my tax return and saw a nice refund amount. But I also screamed at The Ex on the phone earlier when he was almost an hour late to pick up the boys. I think the dark cloud that is attempting to represent my soul at the moment was secretly happy as the minutes ticked beyond the pick up time. Sometimes you just want to be pissed off. Normal, yes. But never good. Because it's not fun to waver between rage and weeping. Certainly not for dainty flowers like myself. Meh.

So I have a day and evening to myself. And most people are busy filling every second of their day with something that's been scheduled or put off for a long time. Many couple friends are doing couply things because it's Valentine's weekend. Good for them. My few single friends already have plans or aren't returning calls. Which is annoying that they can't immediately sense my selfish funk and come pouring out of the walls to cheer me up and coddle my immaturity. What's up with THAT?!

I spent a while pouring back through my past VDay blog posts. The pathetic thing is, this post really isn't being any different than those pouty little diatribes. Holy crap when will I get a grip and just get OVER it? I've never liked VDay. It's a huge waste of money and that is exploited by businesses that make their money exploiting things like this. I don't have the same distaste for Easter and you'd think - as a Jesus loving soap-box climber - I'd be all OVER the bastardization of THAT holiday.

No, this is a particularly selfish dislike. It's one thing to stand with your loved one, agreeing that the holiday is silly and not buying into overpriced flowers, dinners, etc. It's another thing entirely to be single and endure the endless commercial barf spewed from florists, chocolatiers, and diamond merchants. Commercial portrayals of relationships annoy the snot out of me by swinging wildly along the wide spectrum between these two staples:
  1. Dumpy, balding, clueless man unexplainably has a totally hot, smart wife that does everything.
  2. Sensitive, loving (and usually gorgeous) guy says exactly the right thing to the woman in his life to show he TOTALLY gets how lucky he is to have her as he presents some really tacky, yet expensive, diamond encrusted trinket to her.

I barf on both images. And in stead will concentrate on wonderful and realistic couples in my life. They are fun, funny, loving, imperfect, and devoted. They don't treat marriage like extreme dating that can be dumped as soon as it gets hard. They fight and eat crow and work hard to make up for their short falls. They pout and compromise. They exasperate each other and wouldn't trade their spouse for the world.

You guys cannot even fathom how encouraging it is to watch your relationships. I know you will see this and think, "She can't be talking about us because we are SO not the ideal!" but you will be wrong.

Here is to the wonderful loving marriages that I've been privileged to view from afar or from the intimacy of close friendships. Here are to my friends that unashamedly declare their love for the long haul. Here are to the people that remind me that people do still take those vows seriously:
  • Mom & Dad
  • Lucy & Jim
  • Brenda & Larry
  • BigSis & TallGuy
  • Kendra & Donny
  • Monica & The Hunter
  • Diane & Jimmy
  • Trish & Prince Charming
  • Lisa & Kevin
  • Shari & Wyatt
  • Kimberly & Alex
  • CBeth & The Engineer
  • Tiffany & Jeff
  • Michelle & Kenny
  • Leslie & Nathan
  • Deanne & Robert
  • Kim & Ken
  • Jane & Breen
  • Wanda & the Retired Pastor
  • Tracy & Marc
  • Jess & Jeff
  • Julie & Jeff
  • Allison & Rich
  • Jackie & Kevin
  • Jeannie & Jack
  • Alicia & Art
  • Fieryboots & A
  • a-dub & his Lovely Missus
  • Scoo & Mrs. Scoo
You guys - and so many others - really inspire me. Your love and affection means something to someone aside from your spouse.

Imagine that.


Kendra said...

And YOU inspire me, my awesome cousin and wonderful mother and VERY funny friend! And I"m with ya on the "gook" of Valentine's Day...human nature is so very strange how extreme we can take things!! Love you -

Sarakastic said...

I am usually awesome at Valentine's Day, but this year I feel exactly the same way but someday I will be on the list with my as of yet unnamed ninja and you will be too with a man who is aamazing.

Miss Violet said...

I'm so with you on the commercials--let us barf together!

And, in the same breath, almost, here's to real love and commitment.

SurvivorBlessing said...

Hey - I am not on your list!

But I have to say that I don't see Vday just for couples - it's the day of love, so that can be anybody that you love. I used to go out with the girls that day, just us girls! It was alot of fun....

So happy Valentine's Day to you, a person I love and admire! You are loved!!!

JYB said...

Seriously, those commercials are the worst. At best they're pandering, materialistic pieces of junk and at worst they're stereotypical and horribly offensive.

Anyway, I hope things have become a bit cheerier. If all else fails, treat yourself to an indulgent weekend of self-pampering. You deserve it!

Wanda said...

I've been very absent in commenting on a lot of blogs, but felt so honored today to see mine and (retired Pastor Don) on your list of happily married people. Thanks dear. Love and Hugs.

Allie said...

This is a lovely post. THANK YOU for expressing yourself so well. I've been finding VDay particularly repulsive and exclusive this year and I feel slightly guilty because I shouldn't CARE about it; I'm not PINING over my singleton status; so why does it bother me? Thanks for showing me that I'm not just a crazy desperate loon.

Stacy said...

Great post, Lynette.