Friday, January 02, 2009

Strange Places In Which I Find Myself

So here is 2009.  Technically, I still work for the Big Ol' Financial Corporation.  They will pay me with full benefits until the end of this month.  But my last work day was 12/31 and I'm pretty sure, were I to try to log into their network, I'd be blocked.

I find myself in a place not travelled since I was 20.  I'm not 20 any more.  It will take a pretty big work by God to get me motivated.  I don't really want to do all the resume writing, pavement pounding (albeit, mostly on cyber-pavement), clothing buying, self promoting, etc., that needs to be done.  But since my friends have failed to find me my 40-something, single Christian rich guy with no crazy ex-wife, I must go through the job hunting thing.  Blyeck.

Today, I spent a good portion of the day putting thoughts together for a resume.  I sat there going, "Hmm...what exactly have I been doing these last 22 years?"  I sent out emails to former managers and coworkers saying, "Hey, mind if I put you as a reference?"  I tried to put a true list of skills and tools that represent my current knowledge.  I know plenty of friends who put down every piece of software they've ever touched, seen, spoken of, etc as actual skills.  I refuse to oversell myself.  I can read enough java to debug some coding problems.  But I usually end up needing help because it's still rather Greek to me.  So I certainly won't tell them I can code java.  I hesitate to put any of my coding languages down because I haven't coded in over 4 years.

I mean, if I could put down the best parts of my skill set, it wouldn't look all that good on an IT resume.  "I provide the comic relief.  I kill the tension between adversarial IT groups.  I make sure everyone is heard.  Even the timid wallflower with no self-esteem that usually has the best ideas.  I deflate over bloated egos and keep technical people rooted in reality and not in Star Trek ideals.  I speak techie.  I speak end user.  I speak tester.  I can communicate with the lowest pee-on.  I can talk to the highest up mucky muck.  I make things pretty.  But I also make sure the pretty actually works.  I make sure all the different groups in a meeting understand each other and aren't reliving the Tower of Babel.  I'm a unificator."

The hard part for me is, putting all of the above in corporate speak.  I have to use all the correct buzz words.  Whatever the hip corporate vernacular is at this moment.  I have never been good at blowing my own horn.  Not in the business world.  Singing, yes.  But not in the corporate world.

Anyway, I will be going on interviews.  They will be interviewing me to see if I'm made of stuff they want in their company.  I will be interviewing them to see if they are a company in which I want to work.  I will dance the dance.  I'm just hoping God gives me big signs.  I don't want to just grab the first thing I'm offered.  But I also don't want to be stupid thinking there are 8 million jobs from which I can choose.

I'm pretty chill.  God totally rocked the whole move and house purchase into the most awesome neighborhood.  I'm sure he can get me into a great job with the most awesome coworkers.

Anyone who likes to pray?  I'll take anything you're willing to send up.


C. Beth said...

I really love your paragraph selling yourself--too bad you can't put that in a resume.


Mary Ann said...

That paragraph says a lot. I think it's only a couple drafts away from a great intro.

Inkwell said...

That paragraph is a great start. All you need to do is think about the specific situations you were in when you did those things, and write them as "occupational achievements." Use words like "implemented," "initiated," and "facilitated."

Trish Ryan said...

I think your description of your skill set will be perfect for a resume. The only change I'd make would be to call the person you can communicate with a peon, rather than someone you pee-on. The later version makes you sound much less sensitive....

I'm praying!!!!

paul said...

i'm awed by your spirit and the
writing skill with which you
convey yourself in such detail.
You'll get snatched up quicker than front row seats at a lucinda
williams concert.