Friday, April 20, 2007

Easily Distracted

We went to a school function at The Boy's school today. We got there early so had a chance to chat with his teacher. I asked if he had been doing any of the hand or foot touching but she hasn't seen it. What she has seen, however, is that he is so easily distracted that it is detracting from his work. When most kids have finished assignments, he's still at it.

Might sound like a typical 6 yr old. But I know what she means. He has a horrible time focusing lately. Homework tasks that I know can take him a few minutes can drag on for 20-30 minutes just because every little thing around him has to be touched, commented on, played with, used in an impromptu story, whatever. Even at bed time, when I pray with him, sometimes he doesn't even remember I've just prayed. He's so fidgety or just moving his head from side to side on the pillow.

It all reminds me of the ADD or ADHD type of symptoms that can accompany TS. But it also reminds me that, if we sit him at the kitchen table that has toys, markers, objects of interest other than his homework - well, he's going to look at them. If we try to have him do homework in the same room with Lil' Bro - he will get distracted by Lil' Bro.

It also has all appeared right now when his parents are in the middle of marriage hell. He doesn't have to hear the big fights. He's smart enough to pick up on body language or tiny little snitty tones. Somewhere inside him, The Boy knows something is up. And it's not good.

I am vacillating between paralyzing fear and absolute resolve. The paralyzing fear comes when The Boy says something like, "Hey mom, this summer, can we make a play date with so-and-so?" and I think...uh...doubt it because you'll be in day care for the first time in your life. I start thinking about how I'll be able to get him from the bus stop in the afternoon if I'm on a critical conference call. I wonder how the hell I'll be able to do business travel with two small boys - who will take care of them? Right before this all exploded, I said yes to a new position within my company. It could require a bit more travel. So now what? How do my kids go from having 100% of two parents to having more like 50% of one parent at a time?

Based on the last two days of "conversation" hubby and I have had, The Boy's pretty little world is about to get rocky. I have no idea how he or Lil' Bro will take it. And I don't know if and how it might manifest in relation to his TS. And someone please tell me how a totally emotionally destroyed mom is supposed to muster the ability to help him through it.

6 comments:

Sarakastic said...

It may sound trite, & I wish I could help more, but in tough situations I try to focus on Lorelai Gilmore. I know you are strong, & that you will figure out how to balance everything,

Stacy said...

I have no words of wisdom for you, but I offer prayers and cyber-hugs.

Monica said...

Lynette,
For some reason your blog was stuck on my computer. I didn't think you ever blogged. I checked it yesterday at work and found there was quite a bit of blogging and found my sweet cousin in a nightmare.I am so sorry. I just can't believe what is happening to you. I have hurt for you and your sweet boys the last 24 hours. You are in my prayers. You always are so faithful in prayer for your family and friends and now it is your turn to be covered in prayer when you are feeling broken and afraid.

Jane said...

I just know you will make it through all of this. It's hard to see things clearly in the middle of the crisis. Somehow, things do work. I'm praying for you today, as always.

Wanda said...

Dear sweet Lynette:

My computer went off for several hours today so I wasn't able to read or comment for a while.

You are continually in my prayers, and I so agree with Monica. You are always praying for others needs, let us hold you in our prayers and love now.

Angela Marie said...

You will do it one day at a time...

I am praying for you.

Hang in there.

(((Big hug)))